SOLO

As I reflect on the year 2022, I cannot help but be proud of myself for learning to never allow the absence of people to cause me to forfeit creating memorable moments, even if it was by myself. Moving from a different state to a new university as a transfer junior was challenging. I found myself not really connecting with anybody. Most people already had their “friend group” meshed together, and I could not “fit in” with anybody. Yes, I know people, but the bond never really strengthened how I was used to.

This dilemma, if you please, evoked a new reality I had to face. Coming to a new state, I am eager to explore, have fun, and the whole nine years. However, I was new and did not have the kind of friend I could call on to go with me to places. I still do not, right now, truthfully. Now, this blog is not to make you feel sorry for me. Please do not. I am simply building a foundation for the bigger picture. Though, I have come to understand that God places us in different places and seasons for a unique purpose. Some seasons are for close connections, while others are not. Nevertheless, like the Apostle Paul, “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances (Philippians 4:11).”

At first, I stayed in my dormitory, refusing to drive anywhere. Why? Because I was bound to the presence of people. I did not believe that I could enjoy life’s adventures without people. WHAT. A. LIE. How many of us miss out on exploring a new country because we are waiting on a “travel buddy?” How many of us keep postponing different things we would love to do simply because we are waiting on somebody to join us? Yet, life is moving so fast. Life is not waiting on us, but we continue waiting for people, to enjoy it. Who knows what tomorrow may hold, so why do we waste the opportunities of today? To be at the mercy of people is one of the worst gifts we can give ourselves.

For my birthday (March 13th), I decided to step out and drive almost two hours to a famous city. I would have a delicious breakfast, visit an art museum, shop at a mall, and enjoy lunch, ALL BY MYSELF. If any other day, surely one’s birthday would be surrounded by people. Well, that was not my testimony that day. Nevertheless, I had a really great time. I felt loved because I decided to love myself beyond the “bodies.” Beyond being “alone.” That day shifted something in my life. I realized how much I was missing out on. I realized the beauty of life and the contentment with self.

Even further in the year, I understood more the importance of inviting God into those places where we may feel lonely. As cliche as it may sound, God is always there with us. Perhaps we are not connecting with people as we would like because God wants us to focus more on His presence than on those around us. He is that friend that sticks closer than a brother. He will never leave nor forsake us. Even when we feel alone, we are truly never alone, for our Shepherd stands by and with us. (I am not taking away/devaluing the importance of needful human-to-human relationships. Again, it is about knowing the times and seasons you are in. Obscurity is often inescapable).

I want to encourage somebody—you do not have to wait on people to start living and enjoying your life. Just do it. It can initially seem scary and intimidating, but it is worth it. As you may feel invisible to those around you, know that you are forever known to God. Love yourself enough to not need the presence of bodies to determine your life’s fulfillment. Magnificent adventures are waiting for you. If nobody decides to go, will you still? My friend, you must. Do not allow yourself to regret the moments you should have created.

Sometimes you have to go SOLO because YOLO (hahaha)!